I Told You So!

MAN, I really wish I could have written this a couple of weeks ago. I would have sounded like I knew something.

It is amazing that a player, even as Hall of Fame-worthy that Brett Favre is, commands this much attention from ESPN and the media about his retirement. The fuckers fall for it every year without fail.

Welcome again to FavreWatch 2010: A Sequel to FavreWatch 2009: A Sequal to FavreWatch 2008: A...you get the idea. (Hey didn't we just do this last year? Yep!)

What they all seem to fail to realize is that, while I'm sure Brett was contemplating retirement, the man just hates training camp. He has done this definitely now for the last four years now, and possibly for another year or two before that. He has either hinted towards retirement and was taking time to think about it or had retired and then kept teams in check while he was "making his decision" to come back. Ironically, he always makes that decision either as training camp is coming to a close or at least after the teams are done with the two-a-day practices. Personally, I wouldn't want to do all of those practices either.

As the leader of the team, he really cannot come out and say that he does not want to or will not practices during training camp, so he either hints about retiring or coming out of retirement and ESPN send someone down to Mississippi to camp out. We are forced to a seemingly never-ending stream of Favre updates. The sad part is, I can't tell if fans are really that into wanting to know or ESPN has gotten so big and dumb that this is what they think we want to see. Either way, it is bad for the rest of us.

Yesterday, we were regaled with an OJ Simpson-like cruise from the airport to the Vikings facility with media following him every step of the way. Oh for fucks sake, people! If you really believed all of this shit that the man was in such deep contemplation about retirement and had to have teammates fly down to talk him back from the ledge, then I've got some oceanfront property in Arizona for you!

As Brett was quoted as to wavering about playing again this year as training camp rolled around I would have told you right then and there that he would hold out on his announcement of playing this season until the time that training camp would be coming to a close. It is not like I am a Nostradamus about this (more like Nostradumbass) but there is precedent here. And not just once, this in now the fourth time he has done this!!!!!!!!!!!!

And the media falls for it every single fucking time!!!!! I would laugh, but it is just too sad. Which takes me back to the question of is this what people want or what the media thinks we want. I'm all for wanting more information on topics I enjoy, but I really do not think that we need to devote so much time to individuals like Tiger during the adultery scandal, or Lebron during the "Decision" or Brett for his "will I or won't I" drama. Do I want to know if he is playing or retiring? Yes, that I do have an interest in that. Yet I do not need to have a "Favre Watch" to give me a minute-by-minute detail that no one knows anything or watch some smuck in Mississippi giving me his opinion on what Favre is going to do.

I'll tell you now - he will play again this year! And assuming that he has a decent year again and is not in too bad of shape, we will be doing the same fucking this time again next year!!! GAAAAAAAAAAH!

..."Welcome to FavreWatch 2020: A Sequel to..." You just wait and see!

Oh My God! Did That Suck!

No, I'm not talking about our inability to post. Yes, it sucks that we have not posted...anything...for over two months. But amazingly we found something that sucks even more than we do.

I know it is the preseason, but I think Curtis Painter is giving Ryan Leaf and Jamarcus Russell a run for their money in the suck factor category. Yes, Painter was only a 6th round draft pick while the other two were the #1 or #2 picks overall. However, in the two games to end the regular season last year and last weekend's preseason game, Painter has amassed the following incredible statistics:

Attempts: 47
Completions: 17
Passing Yards: 147
Touchdowns: 0
Interceptions: 5
Fumbles Lost: 3
Fumbles Lost: 2
Sacked: 4 times

That works out to an incredible 5.7 NFL passer rating. Yes, that is correct. A whopping 5.7 rating.

Thankfully, I have not watched most of the games that Painter has played in. Sadly, Slut and Kringlebert have had that luxury of watching the debacles in person. I wonder if Polian is kicking himself yet for letting Jim Sorgi go?

However, I'm not totally ready to throw Painter under the bus or out of the Colts' facility quite yet.

It is true that his performance has caused many writers to start creating new words due to how bad it has been in addition to the fact his call duty was the announcement to all Colts fans that they were giving up on a perfect season last year. We have yet to really see Curtis play with the #1 starters to know if things are really as bad as they seem.

When the Colts pulled Peyton and most of the starters last year to rest for the playoffs, poor Curtis got to throw and hand off to the scrub team. Curtis did not have Reggie and Pierre and Austin and Dallas to throw too. Curtis did not have Joe and Donald to hand off to with the starting O-line to create holes. Meanwhile, the Jets and Bills had their starters playing.

The same is mostly true in the recent preseason game. Curtis comes in and Peyton, Reggie and most of the starters head to the bench again. Granted, he was playing against the Niners scrubs but until he plays with the normal receivers and backs, we cannot really know for sure if he can be a passable choice at QB or if we need to start calling Gus Frerotte or heaven forbid even Jeff George to come out of retirement to be the Colts QB.

Wouldn't that be a hoot to have Wonderbeard back on the Colts? Fuck no, who am I kidding!

I know that Polian will has said Painter is and will be the Colts backup QB, but I'm wondering if he has any QBs in waiting on speed dial just in case?

At least the best time of the year is around the corner. The start of the football season and rounding the final turn on the baseball regular season. Fantasy football (my 19th year), Pigskin Pick 'em, rooting for the Cardinals, watching the Cubs fade, rooting against the Yankees...ahhhhhhh, yes, this is a good time of year.

OK, see everyone in another couple of months!

Hopefully not, but no guarantees with this group.