Wednesday, September 3, 2008

You Mean Someone's Gonna Die?

Remember this about Gritty McGritterson?

Seems that he may make the postseason after all.

David Eckstein traded from Toronto to Arizona

Pretty straightforward article by AP writer Mike Fitzpatrick, but there are the normal gems:

David Eckstein quickly called his wife, then finished a fast interview and bounced around the clubhouse exchanging hugs with ex-teammates. The scrappy infielder always hustles, but this was a little different.

Scrappy McGritstein always "bounces" because he is made of rubber.

The trade, made just before the deadline for playoff eligibility, gives Arizona a late-season spark plug with impressive October credentials.

A "late-season spark plug?" That would be great if he was joining a NASCAR team. On second thought, that's a bad idea since his feet wouldn't reach the pedals.

The 2006 World Series MVP with St. Louis, Eckstein batted .277 with a homer, 23 RBIs and a .354 on-base percentage in a part-time role for Toronto. Known for his all-out effort at 5-foot-7, he also helped the Angels win the 2002 World Series.

You ever notice that baseball writers only cite on-base percentage when they are either (a) making fun of new-fangled stats, or (b) using it to justify the acquisition of a decidedly mediocre hitter?

(I think I was channeling Andy Rooney there).

"Known for his all-out effort." It is well known that no other major league baseball player runs....ever. Some amble, some mosey, some even sashay. But only Tiny Mckecklestein runs--with itty-bitty little legs that sound like the wings of a hummingbird.

In all honesty, this isn't a bad trade. The Diamondbacks gave up a class-A pitcher, which isn't a lot. As mentioned already, Eckstein has a .354 OBP, which isn't awful (though his .358 SLG won't turn any heads). And while Eckstein is overpaid, Arizona only has to pay him for a month. Plus, the D-backs plan on playing him at second base rather than shortstop, so his anemic arm won't be as much of a liability.

Of course, one reason he was acquired is because he's played pretty well in two World Series. And if that happens a third time, well...we may all see Zinglebert's wrath.

That alone is something to fear.

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1 Comments:

Blogger Zinglebert Bembledack said...

Oh, for fucks sake!!!!!! Thanks for the surprise, Slut!

Did I piss off the baseball gods or something?

Slut is correct in that it is not a bad trade for Arizona, but people can just not get past the grit factor, can they?

Oh, BTW, I will amend the offer to kill something to apply to the Diamondbacks as well!

September 4, 2008 at 12:20 AM  

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